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August 31, 2006
olbermann for the ages
Again, you will see this one linked to the gills. Don't let this dissuade you from watching, the way my friends' incessant yap-yapping about how cool Kerouac inspired me not to read "On The Road".On his program last night, Olbermann swung for the fences. A transcript is also available as a post on his blog, which he religiously updates (on a quarterly basis). I do recommend the video, because much of the beauty comes from the delivery.
I would tell you the subject of his speech, but the subject is almost irrelevant -- you can pretty much pick from a score of subjects in our current political reality and come to the same result. I would call this Olbermann's Edward R. Murrow moment, though it might not be fair to do so, as he quotes the great man directly. But it is a moment of great import, and hopefully we will get more such moments to come, whether they be Murrow moments, or Howard Beale moments, or even, please God please, a Joseph Welch moment.
It's time for all the good brothers and sisters to stand up. So get to it.
Posted by mrbrent at 09:35 AM
August 30, 2006
hello, nerdcake
Just when I think I know all the link answers, I change all the link questions. But this post here goes a long way in explaining one of the ineffables about living in NYC on a long-term basis. And no, I ain't never hid shit like that, but I've been thinking about it for many years.Posted by mrbrent at 11:11 PM
miscefreakinllania
The little news bits are getting to me today. So let's just run them down and not worry about the five paragraph essay form we try to follow (stupid clincher!).First Boing Boing brightened my day with news that not only is Thomas Kincade a drunken boorish piss terrorist crap landscape painter, he is also a criminal (alleged!), with accusations of a franchise scheme.
These [eventually defrauded] dealers became investors primarily because they were believers in faith, love, family and God, and the paintings reflect those values," said Joseph Ejbeh, a Rochester Hills, Mich.-based attorney.
And I thought just having a Kincade in your home was punishment enough.
Over at Tom Tomorrow's This Modern World,
Rush Limbaugh's stance on poverty is
Which is why we call him fat and laugh!
Coincidentally (or not so), Census Bureau data
released yesterday revealed that the number of uninsured Americans has risen to 46.6 million. That would translate to 15.9% of the population, or a little over one in seven.
We truly are the jewel of the Western world, unless, of course, we're trying to scrape by on $5.15 per hour. U-S-A! U-S-A!
Posted by mrbrent at 04:14 PM
That sounds about right.
I first became acquainted with Poppy Z. Brite from back in my bookstore days when everyone was reading horror novels. (Not me, man! I was reading Bill Cosby's "Fatherhood" like the rest of you.) Poppy was an originator of what you could call "alt.horror", which eventually became, as you are well aware, pop culture. Browse her livejournal for more Poppy Z Brite, and find out why WE ARE NOT OKAY.
The link is brought to our attention by Maud Newton, who I haven't said a nice thing about in a while, so then: remember, a day without Maud Newton is like unto a day without sunshine.
Posted by mrbrent at 09:56 AM
Today, the President must be cranky. Some stupid advisor made him stop vacationing and
sign some autographs in New Orleans.
Wouldn't it have been more appropriate for NOLA to have some kind of remembrance ceremony and the President to watch it from 35,000 feet?
Shouldn't every amateur writey type be making this joke today?
Also, let me reprint a paragraph from the AP story linked above, as I find a portion of it dubious:
Is it just me, or is "uplifting" a word that you only want to read from a journalist as contained in a direct quote? After all, once a reporter starts decided what is uplifting, would that not fly in the face of objectivity? Is not one person's "uplifting" another person's "disingenuous"? Besides, what could be more uplifting than a nice flyover in a plush comfy Air Force One?
Posted by mrbrent at 12:49 PM
There may be a straw man out there that would question the efficacy of prankstering as a means to effect change. To this straw man I say, "Shut up, straw man, so that I may listen to the Department of Housing and Urban Development be forced to again explain why they wish to bulldoze perfectly good low income housing."
That silly straw man. He so stoopid.
Posted by mrbrent at 11:46 AM
I'd like to start with the image of the President, and its fall from grace in the aftermath of the hurricane (as smartly discussed
by Matthew Yglesias. Specifically, Yglesias contrasts the two iconic images of the Bush presidency -- his Ground Zero speech in 2001, and his flyover of NOLA last year -- and then wonders why the Ground Zero speech is considered a benchmark of Bush's popularity. He writes, "In particular, the centrality of 9/11 to Bush's political persona has always struck me as under-analyzed. It's a strange thing primarily because Bush didn't really do anything on 9/11 or its immediate aftermath."
And I'd like to join in the questioning. At which point did President Bush's "I have a bullhorn" act constitute any form of leadership? I wish those that wear the President Bullhorn T-shirts and think of Bush standing on a pile of rubble as the Platonic ideal of presidential action would have the courage to admit their cowardice. The purpose of the federal government is not reassurance, and the ability to appear resolute is not a substitute for actions. People fondly remember the Ground Zero speech because they were terrified and powerless and wanted to be swaggered at so they could manage to sleep at night. People don't want results; they want empty words.
The photo of Bush staring out the window on Air Force One last September 1 would seem to be the opposite of the Ground Zero speech, with a passive POTUS watching from the distance, removed by privilege and unconcerned. I disagree. The spectating president is nothing but what the president looked like directly before and after the Ground Zero speech. Passive and unconcerned is the president's natural state. His speechifying is an attempt to look busy when the electorate walks up to his cubicle.
It was not the ineffectiveness of the government to response that broke the president in the eyes of the public -- for some reason, ideologues are fine with incompetence as long as they get to hate a gay or a brown person. It was the arrogance of the president's indifference that did it. The patronage, the cronyism, the bungling -- that was bad. The failure to even pretend to care a little bit, that was worse.
And our reward, those not displaced by Katrina, is that we get to sit and remember this catastrophe with all the fuck-yous our tiny hearts can hold. Because the country I grew up in is not one that loses an entire city to fucking weather and then tries to build luxury condos in the ashes of the dead neighborhoods.
Posted by mrbrent at 10:11 AM
Hopefully now the Nancy Graces and the Laura Ingrahmses of the world can spend about as long (two weeks, was it?) congratulating themselves for not descending into a wolfpack of incrimination (like they did with Jon Benet's mother/father/whoever) as they did descending into a wolfpack of incrimination.
And a nation of TV watchers can now conveniently forget how willing they were to sit in judgment of a crazy fucker over something as dumb as a confession. Because they looked right into his eyes on that TV screen and they done knew he done it! Thanks, pork chop. Back to some other ghoulish televised diversion, plus also voting in contravention of your own best interest, like usual.
And please prepare for excuse-making, simpleton moral justifications along the lines of, "He may not have done it, but..." Then set your phasers for "autodefenestration".
Posted by mrbrent at 05:32 PM
How off the wire this morning from Monk:
It's true. We spend our days, when not posting, just trying to crack each other up. Like, with that one about what you feed a gay horse.
Posted by mrbrent at 10:29 AM
I especially want to thank playwright Mike Doughty, Julie Wright and
Ben Schneider for "A Sizable Town", the final bits of which I paraphrase here:
Rock on, people of the Internets. Go see the final 24 shows tomorrow and Sunday (links below).
Posted by mrbrent at 09:51 AM
Tonight (I'm on break right now), tomorrow (Wednesday) and the next day (accordingly, Thursday) I'm appearing in
24 Is 10, which is the 10th anniversary something something of the the
24 Hour Plays.
Shows are at the Lucille Lortel here in NYC, and ticket info is available
at this link here.
I've been involved with the 24 since its inception, and I am justifiably proud to be involved.
If you'd like a lengthier dissertation on the 24 and the particulars, drop a line.
Have a nice week.
Posted by mrbrent at 06:45 PM
This morning, around 10a or so, the message flashed by the sign was:
I'm not sure if the theme of the sign is "Statements of blunt obviousness" or "Discouragement to crimes you won't commit". Whichever -- kudos to the anarchists for infiltrating the NYC Department of Transportation.
Posted by mrbrent at 10:54 AM
Actually, that is the abbreviated version of the headline.
The actual headline, as submitted, was:
It's true. The public has a love affair with astrophysics, or least is fixing to have one.
Posted by mrbrent at 04:11 PM
And while I'm at it, let me also recommend the site
Comics Curmudgeon, which takes our hobby of tracking bad comic strips and turns it into a bona fide industry. [Via Wolcott]
And finally, a heartfelt goodbye to
Sploid, which we always thought was a consistently funny aggregation of news both mainstream and fringe. It just goes to show you: what Denton cannot monetize he will fly straight into the ground like a dart. (I know, it's called "capitalism", on which the jury is still out, if you ask me.)
Posted by mrbrent at 11:16 AM
Nope. No T-shirts, even.
I'll just have to take solace in the spectacle of a sitting Senator (and hyped '08 presidential prospect) trying to talk his way out of smilingly hurling an ethnic slur (on videotape!) at a man whose skin was a few shades darker than cream.
He meant to say "mohawk"? Check.
He doesn't know what the word means? Check.
He made up a word, and it sounded so good he said it twice? Check.
Ned Lamont distracted me into blurting a bad word? Stay tuned.
Ooh, I do believe he's hit below the waterline with his own petard!
And for once, after the obligatory
damage-mitigating meeting with the offended parties, I just wish that the local leaders would say, "He looked us in the eye and told us that he would never intentionally say a racial slur. Personally, I think he's full of shit."
Posted by mrbrent at 01:37 PM
As a public service, I picked up a "new" ridiculous snack food that I espied while waiting in line at the supermarket. (Which is where most ridiculous snack foods are launched -- especially those that will fail -- in the checkout line impulse-purchase display.) The snack is called
Nobby's. Nobby's are manufactured by the ubiquitous Frito-Lay. They are described as "crunchy coated peanuts". They are the kind of product that a friend would slap out of your hand if they saw you in the act of purchasing it.
Sadly, your friends would be right. First, the "crunchy coating" is not is as exciting as it sounds -- it's actually just the goop that they extrude into a Dorito. So, yes, the snack experience is that of eating a Dorito-covered peanut, or a Dorito with a surprise peanut center. Those would be two experiences I've never spent any time desiring. The flavor (I opted for the "Ranch" flavor over the "Zesty Salsa" flavor) is identical to that of the "Ranch" flavored Dorito, or potato chip, or any other "Ranch" flavored Frito-Lay product. There's enough salt and MSG to give it a big pop, and then enough secret chemicals to make it savory. Also, there must be some GM high-fructose corn syrup in there -- it would just seem right.
Finally, the name -- "Nobby's" -- is offensive. I'm not sure if this is the case with you, but in my childhood, growing up in Western NY, a "nob" was but one of the myriad mild insults invoking the male member, probably reasons easily shown by physical demonstration (with a "knob"). I forget where this came from -- Young Ones? APA-5? -- but I do have a clear memory of it, and its use ("You nob!"). So Nobby's induces a small cringe. And, unless there is another snack that belongs to this one, or unless the full name of the snack is "Nobby Is", the brand name constitutes an apostrophe foul. Why is Frito-Lay trying to endumben our children?
All in all, I recommend opting for either actual indeterminate snack chip, or for actual peanuts. Or try fruit. I hear it makes you swim good.
Posted by mrbrent at 10:45 AM
Today comes news of a
court decision on one of the basic issues facing the victims of Katrina who are trying to get paid by their insurers. Basically it comes down to:
Sadly, the article does not give details on the specific protection offered by Nationwide Mutual, but it is safe to assume, contextually, that the family in question had reason to believe that their home was covered in the case of a hurricane and not in the case of a flood. So naturally the underwriter of the policy will attempt to deny claims of hurricane-caused flood, because their purpose is not to insure you as much as it is to steal your money from you in the worst of times. You are worth nothing to the insurance companies alive or dead; they only want your premiums and to break every promise they make you in the name of "increasing shareholder value".
I could also go on about the dealings of some loved ones with their medical issues, but they haven't yet developed the ones and zeros sturdy enough to contain my spite for the health insurers.
At least we can all warm ourselves in recollections of the nation-wide fight to save the Gulf Coast from Hurricane Katrina. Wait. I think I'm mixing up "the nation-wide fight to save the Gulf Coast from Hurricane Katrina" with "the nation-wide fight to save The Family Guy."
Posted by mrbrent at 03:01 PM
The headline of the
story is "Seven Dwarves more famous than US judges: poll". Which is sexy, and everyone, especially Reuters, knows what moves the news -- sexy. In lieu of summarizing the piece, I give you the lede:
Two things.
First of all, no duh. Has the Supreme Court of the United States ever putt a butt in a movie theater seat? Have they ever sold a DVD? Has a dude in a giant Justice Anton Scalia costume ever terrified a toddler at Disneyworld? I didn't think so. This is not a surprise, nor is it news. You could make a civics argument that the relevance of Justices of SCOTUS should supersede the relevance of cultural icons, but this age of the commodification of intellectual property obviates this argument in a big way.
More importantly, notice that the bar set for the percentages reported was to name two out of seven dwarves, and two out of nine Justices. This is not a high bar. This is a very low bar indeed. Accordingly, the headline should actually read, "Majority of Americans unbearably stupid: poll."
U-S-A! U-S-A!
Posted by mrbrent at 08:52 AM
But I can't bring myself to post it. It's just too unfunny. It's the baseline spewing hate you hear when from that distant relative that thinks you're a faggot because you moved to New York City. And it's amateurish. At least Mallard Fillmore's Bruce Tinsley is making scratch off his odiousness; the dude behind the link-I-shall-not-share is probably posting in between shifts assistant managing at the Blockbuster. Let's let him suck in peace.
In lieu thereof, here is a link to
something actually very funny. It made me laugh out loud, which I don't do as much as I used to. Now the pets are wondering what's wrong with me.
[Very good strip originally found at Boing Boing, which you probably support already.]
Posted by mrbrent at 02:46 PM
Short version: there is a difference between fear/panic and concern, US foreign policy is welcomed by Bin Laden, FDR was a badass, Welchmen torched Nazi Germany, and don't be a pussy. Is good read.
Posted by mrbrent at 12:28 PM
I have no problem with the gloating. At least it's an honest expression of the depth of their commitment to govern. And it gives me hope that maybe they've been so busy aggregating power for power's sake that they've forgotten how naked opportunistic glee in the face of such bad news would make the electorate think that they are feckless and pernicious bastards. And hopefully, Nascar Sixpack and Soccer Housewife will look upon this orgy of venality and think to themselves, "Hey, maybe this year, I'll let someone else vote for these assholes."
At least now we know why the Republican Party en masse started with the War on Terra talking points on Wednesday -- the White House
tipped them off on the Red Alert for the next day. Go, Nero, go.
Posted by mrbrent at 11:01 AM
I tend to agree with
Larry Johnson on these matters, and Mr. Johnson is of the opinion that the British
are overdoing it a bit. It may well not end up as insipidly as the roleplayers in Miami who were caught for want of uniforms, but shutting down Heathrow seems a bit excessive. Mix in a healthy cynicism borne of the realization that US foreign policy is about a billion times more likely to be directly responsible for harm to me than terrorism is, and then you get, "Everyone please shut up." M1-5 busted a cell. Yippee. Give everyone a medal and a cookie and get them back to work. No Apocalypse today, sorry.
And as long as we're banning fluid from airplanes, why aren't we banning fluids from the streets as well? Apparently the Department of Homeland Security cares a lot more about the lives of the jet-setters than the lives of us ham-n-eggers walking to work. Wait, isn't the human body ninety-something percent fluid? Dude, we have to ban people from airplanes or everyone's gonna die!
Somehow, you know that Joe Lieberman will find a way to blame this on the voters of Connecticut.
Posted by mrbrent at 12:13 PM
But the primary is now over, and as DailyKos struggles not to break its arm patting itself on the back, I would like to congratulate Ned Lamont, whoever the hell he is, for his victory. And Joe Lieberman, please enjoy your run as an independent, prolonging your very public and deserved crack-up. Please hit every branch as you fall out of the ignominy tree.
The press has been wrong, characterizing the race as "peace groups" cannibalizing a mainstream Democrat -- actual, it was a race of an ineffective Senator married to his personal power against a mobilized and committed bunch of electorate sick of Joe's refusal to be neither a check nor a balance.
Damn, I sure do wish there were peace groups. And I also wish they had wicked parties. Those are a couple things I can get behind.
* Yes, primaries are creepy. The "we must disagree before we agree" spirit of the primary election is awkward and counter-intuitive. Then again, the two party system is also so, with its tendency to aggregate power for power's sake. "America: Awkward and Counter-Intuitive!"
Posted by mrbrent at 10:11 AM
And then you get the laughing of people who would like to burn the homeless.
But don't just take my word for it. Have a taste from last Thursday, and then imagine the Rube Goldberg-esque contraption that would be required to connect that strip with "funny" as we know it. For the click-weary, allow me to transcribe the strip.
First panel, we see a duck, wearing a tie, holding a book aloft, as if it were a club or a cudgel. Maybe he's just dancing. In the background, the title of this day's strip: "Mallard's Back-To-School Tip #37." Because, you see, in the place where ducks wear ties and beat you in the eyeball with a sharp pointy book, you are back to school by the 3rd of August.
Second (and final) panel is another panel consisting mostly of text, with an illustration accompanying. It starts with these floating words:
The beginning of the tip, apparently. Then, we see what must be a teacher, either a mannish looking female teacher or a forty-ish Dutch man, frowning a some pieces of paper, thinking to him/herself, "F minus..." I hope that wasn't the punchline! And then the remainder of the tip:
I'll give you a second to stop laughing.
We will ignore the content of the strip (which advocates interment camps for "liberals"? or at least some form of eugenics?). The content is low-hanging fruit. The form of the content, though, is a comic strip, and as a comic strip it fails. It never even approaches the form of a comic strip. Sure, it has an illustration, but no nuance of expression, no actually utility in them. They serve to break up the rant, to let some assistants actually get a brush dirty. Mallard Fillmore is merely hate-filled screeds written in crayon. A drunken, aged Al Capp at least managed to adhere to the form. Mallard Fillmore reads like some desk calendar version of a self-perpetuating spite machine.
And as such, we mock it. As we mock the creator, Bruce Tinsley. Mr. Tinsley, you truly are a hack. No, your politics are not the problem; it's actually your lack of talent.
Posted by mrbrent at 01:00 PM
Sure, Frank and Ernest wasn't ever the funniest strip ever, but it was genial little gag strip, and it had this unhinged quality about the art that made it look like the jittery stepson of a New Yorker cartoon (with Zipatone!). Not that I read the New Yorker back then. No, back then, childhood, I read the Pittsburgh Press (also, RIP), which was where I got my Frank & Ernie, and my Funky Winkerbean. And my taste for comic strips, I'd guess.
Cheers to Mr. Thaves, and condolences to friends and family.
Posted by mrbrent at 12:18 PM
The NY Times story concerned how Anheuser-Busch, brewer of yellow beers of great consistency, has acquired Rolling Rock. As bad as this news is on the surface, the worse news is that A-B has decided to cease brewing operations in Latrobe, PA, and move them to the A-B brewery in Newark, NJ, conveniently located right next to the airport. No more glass lined tanks. No more mountain springs. Thirty-three is now just another integer.
As the NY Times linkage policy is not to my liking, I present to you a link concerning this story from
The Beaver County Times. As a one-time resident of Alleghany County, I shout out to you, Beaver County. Hopefully you will be able to make do with locally owned and operated Iron City Beer (unless it's still icky like I remember it).
Posted by mrbrent at 10:41 AM
One of the primary flags that has popped up is not so much the motive or opportunity that rigged elections have occurred as it is the means. Electronic voting machines (as manufactured by Diebold) have been found to have security flaws, enabling a malicious user to easily override votecounting software. Diebold's
response? Absence of malice.
Much like an icepick manufacturer saying, "You're assuming there are an evil and nefarious hired killers out there would use our icepick to stab another person in the brain. I don't believe such hired killers exist."
In argument against this defense, I present you with
Exhibit A -- the St. Pete Times conducted a study and found that, out of restaurants surveyed, less than half would actually serve you grouper after you had ordered grouper, instead replacing it with cheaper fish. As you may know, grouper is a very popular culinary item on Florida's Gulf Coast, as is eating in restaurants. And apparently the restaurants of the Gulf Coast won't let a little thing like honesty get in the way of their ability to put grouper on the menu.
Basically, if six out of eleven restauranteurs are willing to risk death by torch and pitchfork wielding angry Floridians just to make a buck or two, then I'm sure that other folk would risk absolutely no scrutiny whatsoever to rig a few elections.
We need transparent voting with paper receipts. Isn't that what we usually ask of the nations we "build"?
Posted by mrbrent at 10:01 AM
I think the fallacy of this is that, while people may want more good news than they've been receiving, they do not want it in lieu of the bad news. Rather, they'd like less bad news to happen. Talking heads paint these people as reality averse, wanting to have the good news piped into their heads as they are buried in the sand, and this may be the case for the crazified thirty percent, but for everyone else, not so.
On a very basic level, the people who "want more good news" are merely sick of a world fucked up by morons. So let's stick with blaming the morons and not the New York Times.
I know we all know this. I just have to type it sometimes to remind myself.
Posted by mrbrent at 12:25 PM
No, yesterday was quiet because of jury duty, which was, as always, such an honor just to watch the wheels of justice creep along -- the futile complaints of those who cannot bear the responsibility ("I have note from doctor!") and the quiet resignation of those who close their eyes and think of the greater glory of Kings County. I especially recommend the introductory video they show you first thing in the morning, starring Ed Bradley, Diane Sawyer and the testimonials of New Yorkers just like you and me, whiched really worked us up to a fever pitch.
I was not empanelled. I was not even called to a voir dire. I sat for seven hours in a waiting room chair. I think I'm the only American alive who actually wants to be on a jury, just to fulfill my civic duty.
I'm whining to you because you're the only one that cares. And because my neck is stiff and can barely move, which make the whining even whinier.
Posted by mrbrent at 12:58 PM
But I tell ya, the neighborhood I moved into years ago was pretty damn nice -- until the
packs of rabid racoons showed up.
I guess it could be much worse. I know a certain dude who has a family of skunks living in his (urban!) backyard.
Posted by mrbrent at 05:49 PM
They go something like this:
ME: He's a cocksucker.
ME: Literally?
ME: Of course not. He's a criminal. He deserves nothing but bad things.
ME: Like cocksucking?
ME: It's just a word.
ME: It's a word that connotes an actual practice.
ME: Will you shut the fuck up?
ME: Do you have something against oral sex?
ME: Of course not.
ME: Curious choice of disparagement, then.
ME: Are you shutting the fuck up yet?
Yeah, little rows like that are always waking the kids up, in my head. And then there's the consideration of consequences, i.e., what if the target actually reads what I'm writing and objects?
They'd never actually read this, would they?
Would they?
[Hello there, Bald old man. Sorry about Who.]
Posted by mrbrent at 10:45 AM
we will go to NOLA soon
This will be the last word on the Katrina anniversary. For now. By
clicking on this highlighted text right here you will find yourself whisked away to a bittersweet little editorial penned by longtime NOLA resident
Poppy Z. Brite.
We hope you'll join us in mourning our losses. But please don't make the mistake of mourning for New Orleans as a whole, because we're not dead, and we're not dying.
August 29, 2006
he feels your pain, from 9 to 5
"We're addressing what went wrong," [Bush] told residents at a high school gymnasium in an uplifting speech that spoke to the heroic efforts of rescuers and the death and despair left behind when the floodwaters receded. (My bold.)
yes men
A scrap of good news in NOLA. The Yes Men have
arrived.
the president shrugs
There's so much to say about the one year anniversary of Katrina that it's hard to know where to start. And even harder to collate all the little things to say into a coherent post. (Which is perhaps why the professionals keep away from posts and write things like "features" and "books".)
August 28, 2006
hello, crazy dude who didn't kill jon benet
There is little point in linking this story, as it will be having it's going away party tonight, sucking the air out of the newshole for the last time. But yeah,
crazy fucker din't do it.
hey now, monk
Sometimes, correspondence is so good that I am compelled to share.
I wish I could hack in and put a comma after the word "hurricane" in
this headline.
August 25, 2006
this is about as personal as I get -- even in real life
My tenancy with the 24 Hour Plays' contribution to the Fringe is completed. And now I am tired (and no longer making theatrical shows with my daytimes, which loss causes a bit of a hangover). The shows were a success, and everyone agrees that I am a much better actor than I am a writer, which may be a back-handed compliment -- I can't tell.
Once I moved to a sizable town. I moved there once, with my girly girl. And all the while, I thought to myself, "Oh my, what a sizable town." But where was the love? The love, the lovely love, where can it be? And I found that love, right here in my tiny heart. I found the love, and it was so. You too can find the love. Each one of you, in each of your tiny hearts. A sizable love, for a sizable town. A sizable town, indeed.
August 22, 2006
24 hour plays
This is the obligatory "things are quiet: post. And for once, I can be less mysterious than usual.
August 21, 2006
forecast: encroaching weird
I don't know what it means, but I'd like to share. On the walk from the subway to job this morning (in NYC's fashionable but remote 'West Chelsea' neighborhood), a giant traffic sign took up a parking spot along 10th Avenue just past 23rd Street. The sign was one of those electronic display signs that's big enough that it has to be towed from place to place; it flashes LED text to convey important information in the Queen's English.
FAKE ID USE IS/UNLAWFUL
August 18, 2006
i think the public has a crush on you
This is the headline from a follow-up story on the eggheads attempting to reclassify the planets of the solar system:
Public Laughs and Shrugs at 12-Planet Proposal
Public Laughs Coltishly, Twirling a Strand of Hair Around a Forefinger, and Then, Lips Moistened and Eyes Blazing With Something Like Mischief, Shrugs at 12-Planet Proposal
this that other
You will have seen links to this already. I just want to go on the record with how your teeth just might end up hurting, with laughter, etc. Because this page is the funniest little project I've seen in a while.
August 16, 2006
macaca will be over soon, like friday
I cannot think of any witty play on "macaca". No slogans, no photoshops, no T-shirts. Maybe "I'm with Macaca"?
is my snack food consumption ironic?
If you're like me, and you are, then you are partly responsible for America's love affair with ridiculous snack foods. And you agree that no lunch is complete without some small bag of some "chip" probably extruded and then dumped into a hangar-sized fryolator. And dip! Don't get me started.
August 15, 2006
apparently the good news happens when i'm away from my desk
And another reason to hate Big Business. I am not yet as adultified as to own property and obtain the requisite insurance. However, I am one of the lucky Americans who has health insurance, and I even got some renter's insurance (hello, burglar!) on a whim. I read the policies, especially the exclusions. I work in law, so the jargon does not take so much of a toll on me. I'd say it's fascinating, but it's really more stultifying and precipitous.
U.S. District Judge L.T. Senter Jr. ruled that a Mississippi Gulf Coast couple cannot collect damages from storm surge caused by Katrina because Nationwide Mutual Insurance Co.'s policies do not cover wind-driven water damage.
who is buried in grant's tomb?
Yesterday Reuters pulled out the big guns for a story that may well change your life. It's a story that's got the Supreme Court, the seven dwarves, and most importantly, what people think, because, if we don't know what we're thinking, then what do we know?
Three quarters of Americans can correctly identify two of Show White's seven dwarfs while only a quarter can name two Supreme Court Justices, according to a poll on pop culture released on Monday.
August 13, 2006
So Monk sent me a link. It was meant to augment my collection of evidence that the problem with right-wing attempts at humor is not the political leaning of the material, but rather the lack of actual funny. The link he sent was to a blog in the voice of a supposed leftist, a young lady. She would write about the events of the day, and she would generally, you know, support terrorists, blame America, etc. It's a hoot and a snort, yes.
August 11, 2006
put down that sippy cup
As usual, my skills betray me. As long as we're throwing bandwidth at the British terror plot, its undoing and the implications thereof, go read this post, written by John Rogers, who says everything that I mean to say, but much less gibberishly.
repub terror par-tay down!
I think I figured it out. The GOP response to a day like yesterday, of terror-foiling, and events similar to that, is to gloat. Maybe take a few shots at a straw man ("those that hate freedom", or "those that think we can retreat behind an ocean"), and then gloat some more. Really, mostly gloating. A little sniggering, in a gloaty way.
August 10, 2006
the newsmaw demands wall-to-wall terror coverage!
How will I know if I'm panicking hard enough? I mean, the color codes for threat levels are great and everything, but how come they can't just come out and say how much we're supposed to panic, or at least how much panic is required for them to get to "mission accomplished"?
August 09, 2006
your election results will not stop joe lieberman
I've let the CT primary election pass without comment. I do not live in Connecticut; primaries creep me out.* So I left it to the echo-Blogo-box, and we all had our chuckles keeping up on it. (Those crazy angry blog-people!)
August 08, 2006
bruce tinsley, super-cartoonist
While we're thinking comic strips, let's take time for our semi-annual consideration of Mallard Fillmore. To recap, Mallard Fillmore is a comic strip about a duck (talking, naturally). It also has a decidedly Conservative viewpoint. How can we tell? Well, there are constant references to "liberals", and it's also never ever funny. No, instead of funny, you get straw men and ad hominem, and also mean-spiritedness towards the those that are not Conservative. Example (hypothetical): What looks good on a homeless person? Fire!
"Don't do your book report on the best book I've read all year, Harry Stein's 'How I Accidentally Joined The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy'..."
"Which demonstrates that liberalism is curable! (Most educators think that liberals are born that way, and should even be allowed to marry each other and raise kids.)
goodbye bob thaves
As long as we're talking about unhappy endings, tip your glass to Bob Thaves tonight. Bob Thaves was the creator of the comic strip
Frank and Ernest, who has sadly
passed away.
another little disappointment
This is not news I'd expect to learn reading the NY Times Local section. Though I guess Newark, NJ plays a part in the story, which is local to us here in NYC, thus, dissemble, dissemble for intro. However!
August 07, 2006
it's soapbox monday, with grouper
The rigged elections of the past few years is a topic that I try and remind myself to write about as often as possible. To the point of annoyance, hopefully. Everyone has their pet issue, and this one is mine, or one of mine -- no kind of governmental change can happen if the vote is not transparent and honest. And there are many indications that our vote is not safe -- start here and
here and click links as they interest you.
"For there to be a problem here, you're basically assuming a premise where you have some evil and nefarious election officials who would sneak in and introduce a piece of software," [Diebold spokesman, David Bear] said. "I don't believe these evil elections people exist."
August 04, 2006
there must be a pun for blaming the messenger somewhere
Briefly. A popular sentiment of the past five or so years is that people want to hear good news, and that news outlets just aren't reporting enough good news.
This item here is an example of this sentiment in action. You may have also heard this in connection with coverage of such Teddy Bear Picnics as the US occupation of Iraq, where the reporters on the ground are accused of ignoring all the good news, like kids playing in fire hydrants, etc.
August 03, 2006
i had jury duty; it was hot outside
Yesterday was quiet. And not because of the heat. The heat is hot, but it has been hot before. Some even say it will be hot again!
August 01, 2006
why williamsburg sucks
You can call me a cranky old grampaboy. Sure. Whatever. Yeah, I'm stuck in the pepetual nostalgia loop, I remember heinous things (like Breakfast Squares, or the brief paisley resurgence, or the X-Files -- name a decade) fondly. I miss the days of the bank teller and the newsstand, back before we all started dying of ear cancer. And ritalin? Kids are doing ritalin for fun?
sometimes they come back
If you're like me, you actually have a small conscience. Which, married to a predilection to mock and deride public and not so public figures in public, makes for some pretty good arguments inside your head.
ME: Why you wanna call this dude a cocksucker?