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November 17, 2006

you did *what* to jesus?

I didn't think it was possible to have a favorite concession speech.  Santorum and Allen were both creepily cordial; Burns was cordially creepy.  But now I have read my favorite concession speech, and I know that I have a favorite concession speech.

This right here is the concession speech e-mail of Rae Hart Anderson, ceding the 50th District of the State Senate of Minnesota to Satveer Chaudhary.

A line at random:

Take some time to get acquainted with this power-filled Jesus...

Aw man, that's some good cuckoo.

Posted by mrbrent at 4:04 PM

if the glove fits stfu

Today is a day that I am eagerly awaiting.  Because today I am going to devote my valuable surfing moments to one thing and one thing only: reading what people think about O.J. Simpson.

Because, really, about what could I care more than what people think about O.J. Simpson?

I know that America will not let me down.

Posted by mrbrent at 11:11 AM

November 16, 2006

glenn beck

I've thought for a while this dude was one of the dumber dudes out there.  His name is Glenn Beck.  He was some radio talkshow host plucked from obscurity to host a television program for them.  My bad feelings towards him began when CNN ran a radio campaign with Beck speaking, sounding like an idiot nephew of Andy Rooney ("And what is it with the Congress, anyway?"), and bragging that he was not afraid to be politically incorrect, which is a very brave notion for 1993.

Beck was interviewing Representative-Elect Keith Ellison, a Democrat from Minnesota.  Ellison is also the first Muslim to serve in the Congress.  Beck puts his best foot forward:

And I have to tell you, I have been nervous about this interview with you, because what I feel like saying is, "Sir, prove to me that you are not working with our enemies."  And I know you're not.  I'm not accusing you of being an enemy, but that's the way I feel, and I think a lot of Americans will feel that way.

While the tactic of hiding behind "what I feel like saying" is fascinating in its wussiness, it really doesn't take anything away from the glaring xenophobia of a man who is not so smart.  And yes, there is the obligatory "And I like Muslims!  I've been to mosques!" prefacing the hate.

Of course, you might have already seen this linked up.  For that reason, I give you an extra special bonus idiocy from the mouth of Glenn Beck:

You come from a district that is heavily immigrant with Somalians, and I think it`s wonderful, honestly.

I look forward to bringing you more Glenn Beck in the future.  He is my new favorite doughy white guy straw man pinata.  And I think a lot of Americans feel that way.

Posted by mrbrent at 11:44 AM

November 15, 2006

fair and balanced is the obvious punchline, yes

This link is making the rounds, so let me also throw my hat on the chopping block.  If you click over to here, you will see an internal Fox News memo obtained by the Huffington Post from last week.  it contains the directive to search for video of terrorists celebrating the Democratic election gains.

True, you have to be pretty naive to get your grits all scrambled over Fox News carrying some bias in their coverage.  Sky is blue, water is wet, etc.  But, in the same breath, a smoking gun of a network, licensed to be carried on the public airwaves by the FCC, attempting to manufacture news ("be on the lookout for...") is pretty significant, as far as things like "betrayal of the public trust" go.

I never went to J-school, but I'm pretty sure that planting news flies in the face of every ethical constraint a journalist has, unless you're trying to start the Spanish-American War or something.

Where is the straw man to defend this?  I feel punchy this morning.

Posted by mrbrent at 12:05 PM

November 14, 2006

i can stop whupping on headlines any time i want

Hey look, a headline!  Sometimes, I see one and I'm taken back to the days when I played tee ball.
• Study: Safety gear may not fully protect young athletes' hearts

For what helmet or faceguard can withstand the power of love?

Posted by mrbrent at 9:04 AM

November 13, 2006

iraq study group

This may be needlessly snarky.  It seems our national appetite for snark is on the wane, so, forgive me in advance.  But couldn't someone have thought of a better name than the Iraq Study Group?

True, it is refreshingly free of Orwellian doublespeak -- no obvious lies are contained therein, like in "No Child Left Behind", or "Clear Skies Initiative", which are concerned with, respectively, leaving children behind and unclearing skies.  The Iraq Study Group is in fact a bipartisanish group devoted to studying the situation in Iraq.  Obviously, somebody blinked.

But at the same time, it comes off like some ad hoc high school club, a bunch of well-meaning upperclassmen getting together afters chool to pad their extra-curriculars for eventual Ivy applications.  If this is truly the white horse riding in to salvage our ineffective occupation of Iraq, shouldn't the name be a little brighter?  Like maybe, the "Persian Leadership Council", or "The Western Asia Commission"?  Or maybe even something catchy, like, "Splenda".

Just to take the frump out, so to speak.  I just hate to think that anyone would have any hopes and dreams pinned on something so joylessly named.

Though it wouldn't have been a half-bad name for a band.

Posted by mrbrent at 10:36 AM