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November 29, 2006

somebody gonna slap the taste out of a certain president's mouth

I liked Jim Webb from the git-go.  I've always had an affinity for retired military who turn to book-writing.  I don't know why.  You take a bad-ass, and then you add Man of Letters to his c.v., and then all of a sudden you have the baddest bad-ass evah.

Which is I guess what Senator Webb is -- please refer to his recent strong play for Greatest Senator of All Time.

Looks like Senator Webb came to Washington for two things, and he's all out of one of them.  And now, an anxious but grateful nation is daydreaming feverishly.

Posted by mrbrent at 10:58 AM

November 28, 2006

by any other name

We've been having some pretty lengthy discussions around here, but we've finally come to a decision.  We are finally going to stop referring to the American occupation of Iraq as a "civil war".

From now on, we will refer to the situation in Iraq as a "really fun party with soda pop and cake, which the Administration is in no way responsible for".

We are internally referring to this decision as our "Walter Cronkite moment", so hopefully we will be invited onto a talkshow soon.  The Megan Mullally Show would be super.

Posted by mrbrent at 12:06 PM

November 27, 2006

on the slow days, there is always a headline somewhere

I saw this little headline, and boy howdy did I flip my wig!  (That's right, "!")
• New program to certify toys as 'asthma friendly'

Now who in their right mind give asthma a gol-darn toy?

And don't get me started on them AIDS Walks, neither!

(I will file this poor, poor stab at entertaining you, the reader, under, "Metonymy, And How It Cannot Carry A Punchline")

Posted by mrbrent at 3:39 PM

useless commodification is worth fighting over

I thought I was watching too much TV, and I still hadn't seen this.  Apparently some cellular phone service provider has an advert running that somehow directly references the motion picture "A Christmas Story".  I learned this by reading the Business Section of the New York Times.  I also learned that this advert is fully licensed; both the studio and the Jean Shepherd estate have agreed to this and have accepted their truckfuls of cash.

Someday the last cherished memory, the last good thing, will have been commodified -- dragged out into the public square and cut up into little pieces and affixed with price tags.  It is the price you pay for liking something, they will say, that it will be turned crass and vulgar and profitable by people you despise.  I am warning you now of this someday, so that you may prepare your torches and pitchforks.

Of course, the (an?) irony is that the qualities of "A Christmas Story" that made it so appealing -- it's lack of guile, the fact that it only began to be shoved down one's throat recently -- are the same qualities that make it's appropriation in a TV commercial feel a little bit rape-y.

So, unnamed cellular phone service provider, anonymous ad agency -- fuck all y'all.  And that is a very sincere "fuck you", from the depths of my tiny little heart.

Posted by mrbrent at 9:54 AM